December First, Two Thousand Fifteen
It's been 11 days since we realized we were going to buy a new house. And I am currently typing this in our new living room. We pushed everyone around us and ourselves to the brink, but I DID IT I GOT US IN A NEW HOUSE FROM A DEAD STOP IN UNDER 2 WEEKS. Ha ha!!! Wonderful.
Not only that, it already feels like home. The kitchen, the living room, the master bedroom and Oz’s room are all pretty close to where they’re going to be (for the foreseeable future.) Anyway, long story short, we're awesome.
The ladies are down, and one is fussing real good. Sounds like Ellie, maybe? The 8-11PM shift is always hard for them. I wonder why… Last night it was the same story, and even Oz was giving us grief. So then this happened:
Through all this madness, my poor unreleased album keeps nipping at my heels like an angry little dog. Like a chained animal pulling at the stake in the ground. Makes me a bit ill to try and summon the gusto to finish this thing and get it out properly. May just push it aside for a while to prevent nervous breakdown. Simply too daunting a task right now. (Editor's note: It was 'pushed aside' for 11 months. 'Edie\Abel' - out now!)
Also of note, two days ago was the girls' due date, technically. Or rather, her due date, because if the pregnancy would have made it this far it would have been a singleton. And considering that they were born at 34 weeks, that makes it 6 weeks (!!!) since these little critters were thrust into our lives. As with time, always, it feels like ten years ago, it feels like yesterday.
Looking at the nuggets just now, hearing them make coos and hiccups and grunts and chirps, thinking how insane it’s going to be when they'll need to ‘have a bedtime’, with pyjamas and stories and teeth brushed and the whole ritual. How nuts will that be. And yet, there I was two months ago thinking about them being here at all, and how insane THAT will be. And here they are. And it's just normal. Basically.
However last week I did have my first very bad time through all this. Was left alone virtually all day with all the kids, which is normally not a problem, but the lack of uninterrupted sleep must have caught up with me, because I felt dead on the inside. I remember looking at my daughters with nothing but painful obligation. Slept through the alarm and woke up at 2:43AM feeling absolutely miserable to be changing diapers yet again.
It passed, but yikes. This is why babies are cute, so that parents don't go bonkers and move to Fiji.
Luckily, as with all things, there are ways of dealing.